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Most commonly used for pegging (that’s dildo-in-butt) and strap-on sex (that’s dildo-in-any-hole play), strap-on harnesses secure a dildo in front of the wearer's genitals, like a make-shift penis. Nearly as versatile as a sex pillow, strap-ons can be used for both vaginal and anal penetration, as well as to simulate a blow job and more, says Searah Deysach, sex educator and owner of Early to Bed, a pleasure product company in Chicago. And if you're a strap-wearer who's also interested in vaginal penetration, you can even find a strap-on with a double-ended dildo.
With so many ways to use a strap-on, it should come as no surprise that options abound for first-time buyers.
If you're a newcomer to strap-on sex or pegging and aren't sure what you'll like? Consider investing in a kit. Generally speaking, they’re easier to purchase and less expensive than buying the dildo and harness separately. Then, once you've mastered the kit, you can use that as a guide to help you decide which kinds of harnesses and dildos you'd like to try, Deysach says.
But Lisa Finn, a sex educator and marketing director for Babeland, also recommends shopping "a la carte" to truly customize your experience, especially if you're shopping with a partner. "I always recommend... having the person that’s going to be wearing the strap choose their harness so that it’s the one that’s the most comfortable for them, and then having the person that’s going to be on the receiving end choose the dildo, since that is where it will be going," Finn says.
Meet the Experts:
Searah Deysach is a sex educator and owner of Early to Bed, a pleasure product company in Chicago.
Lisa Finn is a sex educator and marketing director for sex toy shop Babeland.
Ashley Cobb is a sex educator and sexpert for sex toy shop Lovehoney.
Taylor Sparks is the founder of Organic Loven, the largest BIPOC-owned online intimacy shop.
Ahead, everything you need to consider when buying your first strap-on—but first, here are the top 28 expert-recommended strap-on kits, harnesses, dildos, and even accessories.
Gabrielle Kassel (she/her) is a sex and fitness journalist committed to helping people feel the best they can in their bodies. In addition to Men’s Health, her work has appeared in publications such as Shape, Cosmopolitan, Well+Good, Health, Self, Women’s Health, Greatist, and more! In her free time, Gabrielle can be found coaching CrossFit, reviewing pleasure products, hiking with her border collie, or recording episodes of the podcast she co-hosts called Bad In Bed. Follow her on Instagram @Gabriellekassel.
Lydia Wang is the love & life editor at Women’s Health, where she writes and edits articles about sex, relationships, identity, and pop culture. She lives in New York and spends way too much of her free time reading romance novels in coffee shops and tweeting about her favorite dating shows.
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